It was one of those days where I woke up and could sense something was about to happen. I wasn’t sure what, but I felt the familiar feeling that the pieces of my life were about to become blended into something new.
Every small interaction and every single moment I had experienced in the previous week had perfectly led up to that specific day.
On this particular Monday that began unlike any of my typical manic Mondays, I found myself in a doctor’s office for a lengthy appointment [that I dread going to every nine months]. During these appointments, I am periodically left alone. This time was no different though with each passing second I could feel the anticipation of something about to happen. I was on the verge of tears, though unsure of the reason why, and I felt my heart was prepared for whatever news was about to come. Suddenly, my daily YouVersion app “bible verse of the day” alert popped up on my phone screen:
“For we are His workmanship [His own master work, a work of art], created in Christ Jesus [reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, ready to be used] for good works, which God prepared [for us] beforehand [taking paths which He set], so that we would walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us].” ~ Ephesians 2:10 (AMP)
He was with me.
Reading those words as they appeared on my screen, I knew God was there with me. In that very small place and ordinary space of time, my Lord was with me.
Whatever I was about to learn, I knew it was for a purpose that was predestined long before I even took my first breath on this earth. Overcome with an intense calmness and peace, I allowed my eyes off my phone as the doctor came in to greet me.
What happened next can be best described as God’s complete and utter faithfulness. There is so much to this long story but the short of it was a new and bright light was shined on some very dark and old experiences.
Over 2012-2017, I was struck by many storms, had encountered many trials, had endured too much heartache, and had persisted to question God “why?” Why this? Why that? Why? WHY? WHY???
In that office on that unusual mundane Monday, everything was unexpectedly brought full circle. Link by link, each little instance I had experienced became clearly connected together until a complete union was formed. It was like my puzzle of life was finally starting to take shape and for the first time I could start to see little pieces reveal a much bigger picture. I held it together during the appointment but as soon as I got to my car I broke down with emotion. The tears streaming down my face were not of fear or of sadness for what I had just learned. The tears releasing from my physical body were from my spiritual soul expressing pure awe and wonder of God’s marvelousness.
I write this not to tell you I received the answers to life’s greatest challenges or that I discovered the “secret sauce” behind God’s recipe of life. Absolutely not! What I did learn, however, is that each and every second we breathe life on this planet is intentional.
The very littlest of moments are orchestrated for a much bigger reason. They are designed for a specific purpose and play a significant role in our life story.
The terrible, tragedies that make you want to rip out your heart or question the meaning of life or even the God who created you…yes, even those.
And the horrible heartaches and unbearable disasters including the ones that make you scream and shout, “Why, God, WHY???” as you fall on the floor in fetal position and ugly cry until your soul becomes dry?
Yes. Even those.
I know everything happens for a reason because the 5+ years I endured that had me both climbing mountains and wandering through the desert are just now beginning to make sense. These were things that seemed both random and unfortunate, like bad luck or drawing the short straw, and now they are being pieced together like a puzzle that is still incomplete but is finally starting to take shape.
God is faithful, friends. So faithful. I have learned this heavily over the last 9 months since relocating from Scottsdale, AZ back to my hometown of Grand Rapids, MI. In more ways than one, God has slowly unveiled His purpose for the pain I experienced in prior years. I cannot express this enough – I do not have all of the answers or the key to unlock God’s mysterious ways, but I do have a faith that has been pressed, stretched and tested to the limit only to become the strongest it has ever been.
And I would do it all over again if it would bring me to the place I am today.
God is good. He is faithful. His timing is perfect. His plan is intentional.
The timing of the news I received came days after I was internally struggling with my purpose and identity. I was questioning what I should be doing with my life, knowing I was made for more but not knowing what the more is. Then it happens that Ephesians 2:10 is designated the “verse of the day” on the exact day God chose to remind me that I absolutely, 100% have a divine purpose. He has assigned me so much more than I can even imagine even if I do not know what it is in this moment.
And He has the same promise committed to you.
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“We have become His poetry, a re-created people that will fulfill the destiny He has given each of us, for we are joined to Jesus, the Anointed One. Even before we were born, God planned in advance our destiny and the good workswe would do to fulfill it!” ~ Ephesians 2:10 (TPT)
“Now God has us where He wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all His idea, and all His work. All we do is trust Him enough to let Him do it. It’s God’s gift from start to finish! We don’t play the major role. If we did, we’d probably go around bragging that we’d done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join Him in the work He does, the good work He has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.” ~ Ephesians 2:10 (MSG)